An Inertia to Work After Rest

Photo Credit: Eunice Teo

The past three weeks have been bliss - and I have been yearning for it all year.

A respite from work, weekend cuddles with the missus, and traveling around Singapore for food.

This is the reason why I work hard - to make moments like this possible, both now and for the foreseeable future. And this motivation presents an irony - because working as a freelancer means that taking a break to sit down and smell the roses has real and immediate opportunity costs.

Doing so also presents a bit of a risk. You see, after running this marathon for well over a year, trying to get back on track after a comfortable three week break is more frustrating than I'd imagined it to be.

Before I continue, let me firmly acknowledge that rest is vital for any journey. There is little point in going further down the road with limited capacity to take in what the journey offers.

But the comfort zone is very tempting, and I constantly feel like settling in it. Despite the fact that I find tremendous meaning in the work that I do - producing documentaries is not a comfortable process.

Yet, I know I must go back. Because there is work to be done. I am fortunate to have worked to a point where there are projects on my calendar weeks (sometimes months in advance)and the people are awaiting my delivery of a personal promise, to do justice to their stories.

When is rest, recuperation? And when is it more an excuse for procrastination? I cannot tell you, for I am still in limbo. I gain comfort from my sense of responsibility to pull me out of such a "daze" in due time, but I dislike the fact that I am not in control of such impulses.

And this is the inertia that I am forced to confront every time I complete a period of rest following a major project. How do I get going again, and more painfully, how do I tell the ones I love to wait for me once more?

I have tried plenty of ways to start meaningfully. I redid my workspace, to signal a new chapter to come. I spent too much time on it, so much so that my other to-do's such as organising my media files, learning a new team management software, and keeping up with my workout regime had all been delayed.

And now, with the break seemingly over, as five projects require my timely attention, these to-do's that I looked forward to checking off now haunt me on my calendar - day after day as I push them back till another opportunity arrives.

Surely there is a better way - and when I find it, I will revisit this article.

Till then, be sure to take a break when you can, I know I enjoyed mine.